What the Phuck is up with ‘Phantasm 5’?

Phans want to know!

 

It’s been over a year since Ain’t It Cool News phirst reported that Phantasm: Ravager, the 5th chapter in the phranchise, had been completed in secret and was set to unleash itself upon dedicated phans “sooner than you think!” Considering the 4th installment of Phantasm ended on a cliffhanger back in 1998, this news was met with incredible excitement and enthusiasm.

The_Tall_Man

14 months later, and it looks like we’ve been misled. There is currently no release date set phor Phantasm: Ravager. I don’t know about other phans, but when I heard “sooner than you think” I expected to see Ravager, you know—soon! [In my best Inigo Montoya voice] Maybe these words don’t mean what they think they mean.

The rabid enthusiasm for Phantasm: Ravager has done nothing but wane since news of its existence dropped in May of 2014. The philmmakers have essentially allowed boatloads of bankable excitement die down amid a near complete news blackout. Smells like trouble if you ask me.

The #1 source for Phantasm news is a blog called The Phantasm Archives, which gives phans semi regular updates 2 or 3 times a month. Careful examination of older and recent entries, however, seems to confirm my suspicions that something’s rotten at Morningside Cemetery.

Phantasm-Ravager

An entry dated January 20, 2015, read, in part: “There has been an enormous amount of speculation in the wake of last year’s surprise announcement that a new Phantasm sequel was on the distant horizon…” Did you catch that bit of deceptive revisionist history? In March 2014, no one said Ravager “was on the distant horizon”; we were told it would arrive soon! This kind of evasive backpedaling is an insult to those of us who actually have an attention-span.

But the real, “Aha! Caught you in a lie!” moment comes phrom an entry dated May 1st, 2015, which discusses details of the original Phantasm’s recent screening at the Alamo Drafthouse in Texas. Tossed in like an afterthought is this depressing bombshell:

As for [Ravager]’s release date, [phranchise creator] Don Coscarelli revealed that the film is STILL in post-production and that they’re STILL trying to find a home for it.”

Cue the crashing disappointment!

phantasm-ravager-first-footage

So let’s get this straight: Despite being told over a year ago that Ravager would be released “sooner than [we] think” it turns out that the philm is still in post-production (i.e. not phinished) and that they‘re still looking for a distributor. Phor laymen, no distributor basically amounts to no significant phuture phor the movie (at least in the phoreseeable future).

Suddenly, Ravager seems less like a nearly completed pheature and more like a combination of various side-projects hastily assembled into a single narrative. After waiting patiently for resolution since 1998’s cliffhanger, this is no way to treat such a loyal phan-base.

Phantasm doesn’t have a huge population of phollowers, but they’re passionate. In the months since teasing us with what now appears to be inaccurate information, those helming the phranchise’s phutrure have attempted to keep us sated with pseudo-news and consolation prizes, including:

  • A Phantasm-themed ball held during Texas Frightmare Weekend 2015 that included a musical performance by Reggie Banister and a costume contest.
  • A gallery of Angus Scrimm signing autographs at Days of the Dead 2015 in Atlanta.
  • An announcement that Mondo would be re-releasing the original Phantasm soundtrack on vinyl.
  • An announcement that Angus Scrim has been interviewed for a phuture edition of Scream Magazine.

I don’t mean to sound ungrateful, but I don’t give a damn about pictures, interviews, or costume contests. And while I’m sure some hardcore phans are also record collectors, releasing the score on vinyl (a total niche) feels a bit like exploitation. I’m sure some people are so dedicated to the phranchise they’ll buy the album even if they don’t have a turntable to play it on!

Thanks, but no thanks. We don’t need more stuff from Phantasm’s past. What the legions really want is Ravager—like we were promised an unforgivably long time ago.

photo 3

It’s pretty, but I’d rather see Ravager.

photo 1

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Part of what makes this phiasco sting like hell is the fact that the trailer for Phantasm: Ravager, also released in March 2014 as proof the philm was eminent, is nothing short of spectacular. It looks like everything a phan could dare hope to dream of: Reggie crossing over into The Tall Man’s dimension, a visit to the dwarves’ Martian-esque home world, and—my God look at the size of that sphere!

I’m willing to entertain the notion that Ravager has been delayed by unforeseen phorces that simply couldn’t have been anticipated or avoided. But the admission that the philm isn’t even phinished makes me pessimistic—and just a bit pissed. We’ve been manipulated!

The truth as I see it: Ravager is no closer to being released today than it was when news phirst broke of its existence back in March 2014—and that’s a phucking shame.

Prove me wrong Don Coscarelli!

Phantasm-Ravager-image-2

Have you been phrustrated by the lack of information regarding a release date for Phantasm: Ravager? Do you pheel like you’ve been lied to or manipulated? Sound off in the Comments section!

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9 Comments on this post.

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  • Kendall
    4 June 2015 at 5:19 am - Reply

    Honestly, I find this article WAY TOO self entitled and really over-exaggerates the actual reality of what’s going on. It’s more about self-entitled opinions & expectations speaking than the actual objective truth. Yes, it was said “sooner than you think”, but that is a very broad phrase. Even though it is a broad phrase & it has been 14 months now, I still feel “soon than you think” applies because honestly, none of us have expected to see Phantasm V happen at all, so to find out not only that it was happening, but it had been filmed already, that to me still qualifies sooner than I think.

    I do feel they should be promoting it a little more instead of letting news lag on it so much. But in the long run, when it does release, we phans will flock to it all the same because we want to see it. Also, considering it was announced that there were going to be a lot of visual composition effects, along with CGI, I would much prefer they take their fucking time with it and make sure it is as polished as possible instead of rushing through it and possibly fucking it up. Just because it hasn’t released yet and/or hasn’t had a lot of news does not mean something is wrong. This entry was made without studio backing of any kind. It was made completely independently over a span of several years, so there are a lot of liberties and challenges that come with that. The liberties being you have total creative control, the challenges being along the lines of finding ways to get it out there as widely available as possible and taking all the time you have to in order to ensure you have all the viable resources available to make sure you do the film right.

    I don’t mean to sound rude to the writer of the article, because like said, I do agree there should be more promotion rather than so much downtime, but suck it up, man. We just have to wait a little while longer. At least we know it’s coming for sure rather than dreaming about if & when the fifth film would be made (like we had been doing between 1998-2014).

    • Josh Millican
      4 June 2015 at 11:07 am - Reply

      Time will tell, Kendall. But I’m not the only industry onlooker to make some of these observations. This article has a pessimistic slant, for certain, but whether or not my conjectures are exaggerated is not known at this time. As a horror blogger, I put considerable time and enthusiasm into promoting Ravager, beginning last year on the day the announcement was made, so I am disappointed by what I see as a misrepresentation of the philm’s status.

  • bd2999
    15 September 2015 at 8:43 pm - Reply

    Don Coscarelli said at Scarefest this past weekend that it will likely not be until early next year. It sounded like it had to do more with distribution and such. The special fx are still being worked on but it mostly sounded like deals to show the film. Remember this really low budget. It is not like there are hundreds of people working on the FX.

  • christopher
    27 September 2015 at 9:12 pm - Reply

    I am such a huge man of phantasm and the tall man. Always watch them and never get tired of them. I hope Phantasm Ravenger comes out soon and its a blast!!! Im sure Angus Scrimm would like to know his acting was appreciated before he leaves us for good.

  • PHANTASM: RAVAGER to Spend Time on Tall Man’s Planet | Bloodbath and Beyond
    16 December 2015 at 10:02 am - Reply

    […] released a video Christmas card assuring phans that we’d see the movie in 2015. But then, at an Alamo Drafthouse event in June, Coscarelli casually mentioned that RAVAGER was still in post-production (in other […]

  • Jorge
    16 January 2016 at 10:20 am - Reply

    What the hell? Where is this movie? I have been a huge fan of these movies since I was 12 years old. I don’t understand why this movie has not been distributed yet. We are getting close to 2 years since its announcement. Yes, I am going to throw a fit like a child and kick and scream on the ground, where the hell is the new movie? I am super sadders.

  • Chris Hell
    16 January 2016 at 12:15 pm - Reply

    Take your time, Don Coscarelli! We love your films.

  • G-man
    2 February 2016 at 7:49 am - Reply

    And so we enter February 2016 and still… nothing. If it’s a distribution issue then it may never see the light of day 🙁

    Also RIP Angus, you were a true icon!

  • ME!!
    13 July 2016 at 7:28 pm - Reply

    Relax. It’ll come. And even if it didn’t, we have the other four to enjoy.

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